Thursday, November 22, 2012

FTW SELF DEFENSE and other writings

Hi.  My name is Clint and I’m a writer.  It is an affliction, a compulsion, an integral part of my identity . . . it is also something I seem to have stepped away from a bit.  There are times when I am fully committed to a project and type 10 hours a day for weeks at a time.  Then there are times between projects that stretch into months and sometimes years, when I am reminded of the quote from Igby Goes Down where Igby refers to his friends as, “a dancer who doesn’t dance, and a painter who doesn’t paint.”  I used to write a lot of short fiction, some of it quite good, back before the internet.  Regrettably, most of what I’ve had published so far is non-fiction: a few controversial self defense books and an obscure book on the occult that I co-wrote with a friend as a warped joke on various New Age gurus and publishing houses of that time.  After half a lifetime I am finally getting back into fiction again.

I wrote a few books over the years.  My first, UNDERGROUND, was a truly regrettable first novel which has been out of print for 20 years.  Maybe I’ll eventually get around to turning at least part of it into an eBook.

My second book, HARDCORE SELF DEFENSE, was also written about that time.  Then the typewritten pages were stuck in an old briefcase and forgotten for a decade, at which time it was transcribed and uploaded to iUniverse for Print On Demand distribution.  This book provided some of the best information ever written on the combat mindset and improvised weapons . . . but for some reason what most people talk about the most is the final chapter that talks about disposing of bodies (arguably a valid self defense topic in places like NYC and Chicago where civilian ownership of handguns is deemed a major felony with mandatory minimums).  There are a few embarrassing errors in that book which relate to my ignorance of ballistic data during the pre-internet age.  Notably, my confusion of the .38 S&W cartridge with the .38 Special, my confusion of the .32 S&W cartridge with the .32 ACP and my statement that certain low velocity rounds could be stopped by a thick leather motorcycle jacket.  Actually, heavy clothing can stop some weak bullets some of the time if you are very lucky, but in the book I misstated “.32 ACP and .38 Special” when I’d meant to say .32 S&W and .38 S&W, and modern ammunition has a lot more energy and penetration than those obsolete black powder RNL rounds.  I had also expressed undeserved disdain for the 9mm and .44 Special, as data from that time showed poor performance due to overpenetration of 9mm FMJ and the low power of .44 Special cowboy loads, but when loaded with modern hollowpoints both calibers truly excel.

My third book was co-written with a brother, using a mutual pseudonym, as we both knew it would piss a lot of people off.  ARCANE LORE begain as a stack of spiral notebooks that had been written over a series of years by a reclusive hillbilly who also happened to be an occult scholar and a good friend.  After I gave him a copy of HCSD he asked if I could publish his ramblings.  We talked for a bit about how 90% of the New Age books were complete rubbish and decided to have fun with this project, presenting it as fiction and writing from the perspective of a deranged wizard.  In order to get into character I would smoke 10 bonghits every day until the project was complete.  I ripped that out in less than a month and don’t even remember writing it . . . the words don’t sound like either of our writing styles.  My brother was pleased with the end result and it got good reviews, so it might be worth a look.  It has some good information about wards, lucid dreamng as a gateway to the astral, and facts about common delusions and the unscrupulous cultlike groups who prey on inexperienced seekers of truth.

At that same time, we were also working with a dozen other writers putting together a website dubbed “Righteous Warrior Temple” or RWT for short.  I’m not sure exactly where we were going with that, but we ended up compiling a hundred essays about various topics relating to self defense and the warrior mentality, which rapidly devolved into ramblings about movies, food, humor, drinking, fighting, stupidity, and politics.  We also managed to compile a rather impressive collection of quotes.  By the time we were done, my initial “no censorship” policy got me on a government watch list as the alleged leader of a subversive organization, I was put on the hit lists of two violent criminal organizations, and shortly after 9/11 some unknown alphabet soup agency did a black bag job on my house (from where I had been updating the site).  So, needless to say, the website prank didn’t seem so funny anymore, and after deleting most of the objectionable content, a few years later I decided to take it down altogether.  The search engine “waybackmachine” can still pull some of it from the ether, but I decided to save the collection of quotations and a few of my favorite essays and they are now available in eBook form as WARRIOR WISDOM for the giveaway price of .99 cents for well over 600 pages of text.  I suppose that is technically my fourth book.

My fifth book, FTW SELF DEFENSE, was years in the making and a long awaited follow up to HCSD.  I bought, stripped, fired, carried, and later traded off roughly 50 different handguns over the course of 3 years to assist me in my “research” for this book, and I think I covered the gun chapter fairly well.  I also covered the use of knives and pepperspray in what may be the most complete and realistic manner ever seen in print.  The book concludes with a long tangential diatribe about the realities of how the legal system actually seems to work in this country if you find yourself on the wrong side of it – a subject that few instructors discuss in detail.  I am fairly happy with how this book turned out, and people whom I respect seem to like it.

FINALLY completed my novel, THE OUTRIDER, A Dark Urban Fantasy set in the Denver Metro area.  And when I say “dark” I mean really dark – it involves demonic possession on a mass scale, with a cult forcibly recruiting the city's homeless to join their ranks, providing vessels for an invasion from the other side.  More details can be found at:   It is Occult Horror with a hard noir edge . . . nothing else remotely like it, and well worth a read.  Ebook version will be available shortly.

The following are a series of .99 cent eBooks I've done as side projects to combat periods of writer's block while struggling with the novel:

This was an afterthought which turned into a side project and ended up taking a lot more time to complete than I’d anticipated.  NO BULLSHIT GUIDE TO WOMEN’S SELF DEFENSE was intended to be a simple pamphlet which became over 70 pages long.  I used to informally instruct a number of women – mostly friends and girlfriends – in basic self defense, focusing primarily on awareness, avoidance, and brutal one shot stops when the threat could not be avoided.  This instruction would usually cover a wide variety of topics, tailored to the individual – but most of these individuals were in their early 20s and engaging in high risk behaviors (walking home alone at night, drinking heavily in public, dating strangers) and seemed to attract more than the usual amount of attention from stalkers and abusive partners.  This eBook is written from that perspective and was not easy to write, as it brought back some painful memories and I’m certain the harsh truth about the need to take personal responsibility for one’s safety (which mandates an honest self-assessment) will piss a lot of people off, but I don’t care.  If you want to stay safe you need to hear the truth without a lot of the sidestepping and vagueness most instructors use out of fear they might hurt someone’s feelings thereby alienating their customer base . . . but I never considered myself an instructor or these common sense techniques to be a product to be marketed for profit.  I felt it was important that this information be readily available to anyone who wants it, so it is priced at only .99 cents (of which I get a royalty of three thin dimes . . . which I don’t see a penny of until those dimes add up to at least ten bucks).

Second side project was an eBook on basic DIY cleansing, cursebreaking, and exorcism techniques from notes compiled during my studies with Scribe 27, priced at a mere .99 cents.  Required reading for anyone researching or practicing any aspect of the occult.  PRACTICAL EXORCISM

Third side project is directed towards new gun owners: YOUR FIRST GUN: A COMMON SENSE GUIDE TO SELECTION AND USAGE FOR NOVICES AND DUMMIES.

Possibly more .99 cent eBooks in the future.  Updates to this page will reflect that.

I am deeply honored to have my short story, "LEVEL 5," included in the compilation PROTECTORS 2 to benefit the National Organization to Protect Children, inspired by the 2 years I rode with the Rocky Mountain Chapter of B.A.C.A. Bikers Against Child Abuse.

Best Regards,

Clint Jahn

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